Critique Without Crushing Creativity
There I was, staring at my screen at 2 AM, about to leave what I thought was a "helpful" comment on Sarah's pull request. My finger hovered over submit button as I read my own words: "This entire approach is wrong. Why didn't you just use a HashMap?"
Something made me pause. Maybe it was sound of waves outside my window, or perhaps my ADHD brain finally engaging its empathy circuits after hours of hyperfocus. I deleted that comment and wrote something entirely different. That moment changed how I think about code reviews forever.
That night, I realized something profound: code reviews aren't just about catching bugs or enforcing standards. They're about human connection through shared craft. Every pull request represents hours of someone's thinking, creativity, and problem-solving. When we review code, we're not just examining algorithms—we're entering someone's mental workspace.
"A gentle code review is like being a lighthouse keeper—providing steady guidance without overwhelming ships trying to find their way to shore."
My INTP-F nature has taught me that every programmer brings their whole self to their code. When someone submits a pull request, they're not just sharing logic—they're sharing their thought process, their creativity, their problem-solving approach. As reviewers, we hold tremendous power to either nurture that creativity or accidentally crush it.
Impact: Feels like judgment without context. Makes developer defensive and less likely to ask questions.
Impact: Acknowledges effort, provides specific improvement, invites collaboration.
Over years, I've developed what I call SHORE framework for gentle code reviews. Like Oregon coast, it provides structure while remaining fluid and adaptive:
Begin every review by acknowledging something positive. This primes both you and author for collaborative rather than adversarial thinking.
Never just say what to change—explain reasoning. This transforms critique into learning opportunity.
Present suggestions as options to explore rather than commands to follow. This preserves author's agency and creativity.
Acknowledge when someone tried something new or tackled a difficult problem, even if implementation needs refinement.
Close reviews with forward-looking positivity that makes author excited to iterate and improve.
My ADHD brain sometimes wants to hyperfocus on every tiny detail or jump immediately to " better way" without considering author's journey. I've learned to pause and ask myself: "Am I reviewing to help, or am I reviewing to show off my knowledge?"
most beautiful thing about gentle code reviews isn't just that they feel better—they actually create better code and stronger teams. Here's what I've observed:
Like waves on Oregon coast, gentle code reviews create ripples that extend far beyond immediate interaction. When developers feel safe and supported in code reviews, they:
" way we review code becomes way we treat each other. And way we treat each other becomes code we write together."
As someone who struggles with impostor syndrome and perfectionist tendencies that come with ADHD, I know how vulnerable it feels to put your code out there for review. Every pull request is a small act of courage—sharing not just your solution, but your thinking process with your peers.
When I review code now, I try to honor that vulnerability. I remind myself that person on other side of this PR is probably feeling some combination of pride in their work and anxiety about judgment. My job isn't to be smartest person in room—it's to be a helpful teammate who makes others feel safe to learn and grow.
"Code reviews are not about proving your worth as a programmer. They're about proving your worth as a teammate."
Transforming your review style doesn't happen overnight, but small changes can make a big difference. Here's where to start:
Oregon coast has taught me that most powerful forces are often gentlest ones. Water doesn't force its way through rock—it finds natural paths and, over time, creates something beautiful. Gentle code reviews work same way.
When we approach code reviews with empathy, curiosity, and genuine care for our teammates' growth, we don't just improve code quality—we build kind of teams where innovation flourishes and people love coming to work.
Every review is an opportunity to make someone's day a little brighter, their code a little better, and their confidence a little stronger. That's kind of legacy I want to leave in every pull request comment.
Written from Oregon Coast, where code meets compassion
From our coast to yours,
Keep coding with kindness 🌊💙